Maintaining Ties When Others Cut Them

Abu Hurayrah (radi Allahu anhu) reported: A man said to the Messenger of Allah (sal Allahu alaihi wa sallam): “I have relatives with whom I try to keep the ties of relationship but they sever relations with me; and whom I treat kindly but they treat me badly, I am gentle with them but they are rough to me.” He (sal Allahu alaihi wa sallam) replied, “If you are as you say, it is as if you are feeding them hot ashes, and you will be with a supporter against them from Allah as long as you continue to do so.”

[Sahih Muslim]


This Hadith has three important lessons:

  1. The misbehaviour of one’s relative is no justification for the misbehaviour of another, let alone the severing of relations on that account.
  2. The person who treats his relatives nicely in all events and circumstances is blessed by Allah Who will send from heaven helpers to support him.
  3. The consequence of denying compassion and kindness to relatives is as woeful as the eating of hot ashes.

And Allah Knows Best!

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